Buddhanometry 101

CLASS IS IN MUTHAFUCKING SESSION!!!!!!!!!!

Let's see how your mathematical skills and ratchet awareness stands up to my questions....

Problem #1

If a hood rat takes a 8 inch dick up the ass at 100 strokes per minute in the back of a chicken take out spot in 40 degree Fahrenheit weather for approximately 30 minutes how long will it take for her digestive system to shit right again???

Problem #2

A thirsty ass nigga wakes up at noon and is ready to hit the pavement bright and early.  He has a $100 in his wallet and has needs to address ASAP!!!!!  Should he:

A) On a $50 sack of bud, a box of cigarillos, a couple of 40s and the remaining cash in his gas tank

B) Give the money to his baby mama so she can buy their baby some new clothes and diapers

C) Go to the local casino and try his luck at the slots

D) Go to the pharmacy to pick up his antibiotics and a pack of condoms 

  

Problem #3

If a 5 percenter becomes a suicide bomber by accident (The nigga smoked a phat ass blunt at the gas pump and blew up the bitch!) will the number of virgins he'll have in the afterlife be:

A) Equal to 72

B) Greater than 72

C) Less than 72 

D) None

  

Problem #4

One day, you were kicking it with two of your best friends.  We hanged out with each of them at two separate times.  Both times, each friend made a confession to you after a few drinks and/or blunts.  They both confessed to sucking over a hundred nigga's dicks!!!!! Sheesh...that's a mouthful but anyways what makes this even more bizarre is the fact that one is a male and the other is a female.  Now the male friend happens to be dating one of your homeboy's sister when he was "running his mouth" and the female friend, you know for a FACT, sucked your little brother off last weekend when he came to visit!!!!!

A) Now...which one is the bigger offender: Male friend or Female friend???

B) Which one deserves to get their ass whooped first: Male friend or Female friend???

Please be sure to show your work when you answer these problems...

 

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